All I’ve Wanted All I’ve Needed by A.E. Valdez

All I’ve Wanted All I’ve Needed
A.E. Valdez
Publication date: July 23rd 2021
Genres: Adult, Contemporary, Romance

Harlow Shaw feels naïve for believing in happily ever afters but she craves a love that lights her up.

She thought she had it all with her boyfriend. Until his promising baseball career overshadows their relationship and he asks her a life changing question. It causes her to wonder if what they have is all she ever truly wanted.

Harlow is yearning for more than the curated life she is living.

A trip to Bali, a move to Seattle, and a “burned” cup of coffee lead her to a friendship she didn’t know she needed and a love so deep she can feel it in her bones.

Excerpt

Stepping into my house, I catch a glimpse of myself in the entryway mirror. My reflection is unrecognizable. Another wave of grief hits me as I lean against the door, then slide down it until I’m a heap on the floor.

I’m not sure I made the right choice tonight. Maybe I just fucked up my entire life just so that I could “find myself” and figure out what I want. I don’t know if I just broke his fucking heart for no good reason.

My dad hears me crying and comes to find me.

“Hey, hey, what’s wrong?” he asks in a soothing tone, crouching down in front of me.

I doubt he’ll understand any words that come out of my mouth, but I try to choke the words out. “Hendrix and I … broke up.” I don’t look at him, trying to hide from the judgment I’m sure will come.

My dad pulls me into a hug. Somehow, he helps me up off the floor and guides me to the couch. He leaves me for a few minutes and comes back carrying cups of steaming chai tea. He hands me a cup and I hug it in between my hands, staring into it as if it can tell me everything will be okay.

“Do you want to talk about it?” my dad asks me sympathetically. I don’t want to talk about it, but at the same time, I know my dad can offer the wisdom I don’t have.

I continue to stare at my cup of chai and then I tell him everything: how I’ve felt like Hendrix and I were together because we were comfortable, how Hendrix expected me to revolve my life around him because he’s the next big major league baseball player, how I felt like I was suffocating. I tell him about how I really want to do things for myself and not because I feel it’s what others expect of me. I tell him how Charlotte, Hendrix’s mom, always tells me what my mom would have wanted for me, as if she knows. I let it all out.

He grabs my hand after I’m done spilling my guts. “I’m sorry you’ve felt that way for so long, kiddo. I had no idea. I can tell you right now that the only thing your mother would ever want for you is to be happy. Whether that’s with Hendrix, alone, or with someone else.”

I look at him and he offers me a smile. “Do you really mean that?” I ask him between sniffles.

“Yes, I truly mean that. Whatever makes you happy, I am going to support you… even if it isn’t a college degree,” he says, and I laugh. It feels so good to laugh when all I want to do is fall apart.

“Will you ever let that college degree go?”

“I support whatever makes you happy, but that doesn’t mean I’m not going to bring it up from time to time,” he says with a grin.

“Fair enough.” I chuckle.

“It will take time for you to feel better, Harlow. You and Hendrix have been an integral part of one another for so long. Don’t be so hard on yourself.” He rubs my back as he reassures me.

I let out a sigh. “I didn’t want to break up with him, but I feel like we’re being pulled in opposite directions right now, with him going off to spring training and me being completely unsure of what I want.”

“You’re doing what is best for you. Don’t feel bad. If you two are truly meant to be, you’ll find your way back to each other. I think it’s good that you want to find yourself outside of him. I love Hendrix too, but I wouldn’t want you to feel like you’ve devoted your life solely to him.”

My dad’s reassuring words ease my anxiety. “Thank you, Dad.” I hug him. “I love you.”

He hugs me back. “I love you, too, kiddo.”

I pull away from him and finish the rest of my chai tea. “I think I’m going to go to bed.”

“Alright, I’ll be here if you need me,” he says as he reaches for the remote and settles into his recliner.

I smile at him and make my way upstairs to my room. After kicking off my shoes and stripping out of my clothes, I crawl into bed. I check my phone and for the first time in a long time, there are no texts from Hendrix.

Goodreads / Amazon

Author Bio:

A.E. Valdez discovered her passion for writing when she was given a journal by her 5th grade teacher and has been creating poetry, works of fiction, and gaming narratives ever since. As a child, she wanted to read more stories with people that looked like her.

She loves all things romance, from heartbreak to happily ever afters. She pours her own heart and soul into the stories she brings to life. Causing readers to fall in, and sometimes out, of love alongside her characters.

Amanda currently resides in the Pacific Northwest with her husband and their two sons. Most days you can find her sipping on an iced latte while she writes or enjoying time with her family.

Website / Goodreads / Twitter / Instagram / Pinterest

a Rafflecopter giveaway

Hosted by: